It’s MY (Bukkake) Party…

My seXy series of interviews of X: The Erotic Treasury authors continues with a peek at the final and explosively climactic story in the anthology, Rachel Kramer Bussel’s “A First Time For Everything.” I was especially interested to note that Rachel’s provocative story deals with a sexual scenario that got its name from a place very dear to my heart--good old Japan.

Wikipedia defines bukkake (pronounced boo-kah-kay) as “a person being ejaculated on by multiple men,” and while the act is presumably as old as ejaculation itself, this particular nomiker originated in a Japanese porn film, Mascot Notes, made in 1986. As is often true in Japan, strict laws about the depiction of naked genitals—but not semen--forced the movie makers to come up with a new way to give us the money shot, arcs of disembodied spunk splattering (bukkakeru) all over a woman’s face and body. Bukkake joins manga and sushi as a popular Japanese import in this country as well. There are bukkake movies, bukkake clubs and informal bukkake parties, that is, if the internet can be trusted….

Now this might seem like the ultimate act of degradation for the recipient, whether male or female, but in sex--as in all human endeavors and I’m thinking particularly of S&M--the politics are more complicated. As Rachel’s story very clearly reveals, a woman who throws her own bukkake party for her own reasons is very much in control. In fact, as the story unfolded, sizzling with tension all the way, I was reminded of a sacred temple priestess receiving homage from a crew of well-muscled acolytes.

As is always true with an RKB story, there is as much to stoke your intellect as your libido. It’s a very arousing story in the carnal sense, of course, but I wanted to quote a part that excited me with its perfect description of an erotica writer’s mind:

“Sex has always been the starting point, never the end, to any inquiry about who I am. It’s the gateway drug to, well, more sex, to finding out more about how I operate, what buttons I like having pushed and which I set permanently to caution. This utterly carnal lifestyle is balanced by the hours-days-weeks-years’ worth of fantasies that must jumble together until I’m compelled to act. I’m not just an ethical slut, I’m a thoughtful one. The time I spend thinking about sex, pondering its every nuance and possibility, far exceeds the time I spend engaging in it, and I’m perfectly happy with that uneven ratio.”

Sound familiar?

“A First Time for Everything” is the perfect way to end a very strong anthology, and so I’ll end this post with words from the author herself:

Susie Bright: How did you get the idea for a female-driven bukkake party?

Rachel Kramer Bussel: I like to make my characters (and myself, to some extent) unnerved, thrown off course. In this story, the protagonist thinks she’s so blasé and over everything about sex, but she still has this one big fantasy, and to some extent, is nervous about it. I like the idea that she’s orchestrating it all, but there are still some elements she can’t orchestrate.

There are lots of things that I fantasize about that I doubt I’d ever do, or maybe only if the stars were aligned just so. I like fiction because I can make those stars align.

SB: Did you attend college? If so, which one? What was your major?

I graduated from the University of California, Berkeley, and studied political science and women’s studies. That was back when I was super anti-porn and pretty clueless about a lot of sexual matters in general.

SB: Has your work ever been "made an example of" by various people with an agenda?

I once wrote a column for The Village Voice called “I’m Pro-Choice and I Fuck,” and it was interesting to see the reactions it got from pro-life people. I knew it was a deliberately provocative title, but it was meant to point out the links between sexual and reproductive freedom, because they’re intimately intertwined. Sometimes people have written about my stories or books (or book covers) in ways that I don’t agree with, but that’s okay. One of the hugest writing lessons I’ve had to learn is that once I stop typing, I don’t control how my words get interpreted or used. They become other people’s to do with what they will. It was tough for me not to have the urge to fight (or rather, blog) back, but I realize I have to move on to the next piece of writing rather than wallow in something that’s already done.

SB: Any interesting felonies or misdemeanors you'd like to mention?

The closest I’ve come to that is during my animal rights days as a teenager when I did civil disobedience at a pigeon shoot in Hegins, Pennsylvania. It was a very heady experience, a very us against them environment. I was arrested but wasn’t held for very long, though they wound up releasing me to my friends, who drove me home to New Jersey. My parents, who had been divorced since I was 2, drove together to come get me, and I always say that was when I knew they really, truly loved me, to endure being together in such close quarters for that long!

SB: Do you have any noteworthy hobbies, regimes, pursuits, or collections?

My cupcake blog (http://cupcakestakethecake.blogspot.com) is my little pride and joy. It’s funny because while some people know me for my sex writing, in that world I’m “Rachel from Cupcakes Take the Cake” and it’s very cool. I’ve gotten to meet cupcake people from all over the world and have eaten cupcakes in London, LA, San Francisco, Minneapolis, Atlanta, and Washington, DC in this year alone!

Share Your Thoughts on Book Promotion

There's nothing I like more than chatting about the writing life and I'm going to have a chance to do that lots this coming year in my ten-part series on book promotion for beginners at the “Authors Insider Tips” feature at the Erotic Readers and Writers Association beginning in February. I’m envisioning the column as an informal “chat” about my own experiences promoting my first novel, but, just as my experience involved learning invaluable lessons from friends, I’d also like to include suggestions and ideas from other writers. Naturally I’ll credit you and link to your blog or website and provide a link to a book of your choice.

I have a preliminary list of questions below, and feel free to answer one, a few or all. I know it's a huge list and kind of hard to take in all at once, but maybe if you just let the ideas simmer, something will come up! Even one story or recommendation will be a great contribution to the cause of writerly solidarity. If you have anything else to add or suggest, please mention that as well—we all benefit from sharing. Please send your ideas and the links you’d like to use to donna@donnageorgestorey.com

I’ll let you know beforehand if I’m using your suggestion and will send a draft of the column for your review. Feel free to share your answers here as well—it might lead to a helpful discussion!

Thanks so much in advance for your help! Here it is:


ERWA Column Book Promotion Survey


What have you found to be the most effective ways to promote your novel (or story collection or anthologies)? The most enjoyable?

The least effective ways or biggest challenges?

What has been the most surprising thing about the experience of book promotion?

Did it change your view of your writing and the writing process?

What advice would you give to a person just starting out as a published author who would like to promote their novel/stories? Is there anything you would definitely do differently if you had the chance to do it over?

If you’ve used a publicist or other professional consultant to promote your work what have been the benefits? The downside?

Comment on the effectiveness of any or all of the following promotional tools. Illuminating anecdotes are welcome!

Setting up a website—did you do it yourself or hire a professional?

Blogging

Mailing lists/author newsletters

Reference/advice books—do you have specific recommendations for good or disappointing ones?

Blog tours

Getting your book reviewed—the challenges and successes

Contests

Book fairs

Radio interviews

Approaching local bookstores directly

Writing articles related to your book for print or online media

Bookstore readings

Book parties

Book trailers

Interviews in local or national media

Promoting at writing workshops or through other businesses

Swag--such as postcards, bookmarks, pens, flyers, T shirts, magnets, etc. Which has been the most useful?

Any other strategies you’d like to suggest?

SeX and the Sea

Today I feature an interview with another seXy author, Susan DiPlacido, who is a wonderful writer and amazingly generous, humorous and super-cool person. Her offering in X: The Erotic Treasury, “Beyond the Sea,” is a great example of erotica that transcends the genre—or what the general public seems to think the genre is! I first read this story in Susan’s short story collection, American Cool, which I hope to talk about a lot more with her in an interview here at Sex, Food and Writing in the new year. It’s one of the best “erotica” collections (because of course, it’s more) that I’ve ever read and plenty of critics and prize committees agree with me. I'm not a cruise kind of girl--I prefer vacations where I can walk a lot and not in circles--but my little ship trip with the tarnished silver-surfer Ray and the lovely, but sticky-fingered Isabella was pleasure all the way. Let me just say now, if you never thought a blow job could be a life-changing event (I’m talking to the women, most guys don’t need convincing), “Beyond the Sea” will change your view of the matter forever!



SB: Tell me how you would cast the film version of your story...

SD: Oh, so easy. Bobby Cannavale for the male lead. He's just so charming and good-looking but also really quite fun and funny. And Penelope Cruz for the female, because she's amazing and I don't think Hollywood has yet found a way to bring her to show her off the way that films from other countries do.

SB: What do you really know about larceny and pickpocketing?

The only experience I have with pickpocketing is from this one time when I was in San Francisco. I was riding the bus, cause I was broke and poor. And I saw this pickpocket coming for me. He wasn't smooth at at all, but I didn't even bother to stop him, because, like I said, I didn't have any cash. He got a handful of used tissues. He was clearly annoyed and called me a dirty hippy.

SB: Has your work ever been banned in a nation, or seized at Customs?
My work hasn't, but I have! I'm still not allowed to return to the Bahamas. That was such a fun trip!

Any interesting felonies or misdemeanors you'd like to mention?

Omerta.

When not writing, what are you likely to be doing?

Swimming, gambling, cooking, or watching a movie. And any of those things are often accompanied by cocktails.

When you think of your recent writing, for "X," and then consider your recent sex life in reality, what comes to mind?

That I really should reconsider and take a cruise!

The "X" in January

But there's no "X" in January, you say?

Gentle reader, you are mistaken. January is X month for me, as in X: The Erotic Treasury, a fabulously gorgeous and deliciously addictive anthology of erotic stories edited by Susie Bright. As a long, slow warm-up to Valentine's Day (do you like your warm-ups any other way?) I'll be posting reviews and interviews of some of the stories in the book. For those of you in the Bay Area, you can come hear these juicy tales read aloud by the authors themselves in the flesh, including yours truly. I'll be wearing my lucky cheongsam, if I can shed my Christmas-cookie tummy in time! If you've never seen Susie Bright in person, you are in for a real treat--she's a riveting and entertaining speaker, and my story in the anthology, "Yes," is one of my steamiest.

The X events where I will be reading include:

Where: Diesel, A Bookstore (Oakland, CA)

When: January 22 at 7pm

Who: Greta Christina
Donna George Storey
Pam Ward
Susie Bright

AND

Where: Books Inc. (in the Castro at 2275 Market Street, San Francisco, CA 94114)

When: January 29 at 7:30pm

Who: Rachel Kramer Bussel
Greta Christina
Donna George Storey
Susie Hara
Susie Bright


I'm going to start off the X interviews with my own--since interviews with me have been popular around here lately. This one's short and sweet, a sort of quickie for me. Enjoy!

SB: Have you ever won an awards for your talents?

DGS: I like to think I do it all for love, no reward required, but I’ll admit I enjoy a little recognition now and then.

A few years back Sunset Magazine gave me a “Good Cook” award for my recipe for Bavarian Mousse Rice Pudding. That creation has gotten me some of the best in-person reviews of my career—who can resist a rich, fluffy pudding spiked with rum?

I also managed to snag a special mention in Pushcart Prize Stories 2004 for one of my more restrained stories about sex and Japan, but frankly I prefer no-hold-barred sex stories such as “Ukiyo” in Best American Erotica 2006, which is the prettiest jewel in my tiara!


SB: Tell me how you would cast the film version of your story...

I would love to cast "Mad Men’s" Jon Hamm as the narrator who pushes his lover on to ever-edgier adventures. I love how his hair gets all mussed in those scenes of illicit, untrammeled sex.

For the lover who is sweet and proper on the outside, but wild and experimental (even pit bull-like?) in private, well, someone dared me to suggest Sarah Palin. While she seems willing to give in to the whims of her political party, I doubt she’d sleep with her mate’s best friend just because he ordered her to do it. So let’s go with Liv Tyler—lovely and elegant, but that sensual mouth suggests an intriguing sensuality we all want to see more of.

SB: How would you describe yourself in a phrase, school-wise?

An apparently minor incident in my junior year English class may be responsible for my career as an erotica writer. One morning, I overheard a boy behind me say to his friend “Donna George is cute. I’d go out with her if she wasn’t so smart.”

I blushed and pretended not to hear, but I heard all too well. He’d summed up a well-accepted dilemma in our society, bookish women (and men) are not considered sexy. I think I decided then on some level that I would prove smart and sexy DO go together. And so I went on to assemble a date-defying list of academic credentials.

I’m a Phi Beta Kappa Princeton graduate with a Ph.D. in Japanese literature from Stanford. I know, you wanted to fuck me— but now you have second thoughts?

Fortunately, somewhere along the way men did consent to sleep with me, thus giving me plenty of material for my erotic writing. My readers may not know it, but every time one of my stories makes them spring a boner or get nice and wet down there, it’s a victory for girls-who-wear-glasses everywhere!

SB: Any interesting felonies or misdemeanors you'd like to mention?

Not quite to that level. But I prevented a miscarriage of criminal justice. I once spent a summer working at the IRS, copying the tax returns of British rock stars about their US income—and I saved The Moody Blues from an audit.

More Amorous Secrets Revealed!

My new year is starting out quite nicely, indeed! Yesterday I went public with an absolutely sinful rice-pudding-and-eros tale over at Oysters and Chocolate (and Rice Pudding) and today you can check out one of my most enjoyable interviews ever which is now live over at Jennifer Prado's EMERGE--New Authors blog. Jennifer's the author of Latina in Wonderland and her blog is great! I'm joining an impressive list of new writers and I highly recommend the blog for some insights into the experiences of first-time novelists.

Jennifer asked some really insightful and thought-provoking questions. I just love it when I learn more about my own novel in dialog with a thoughtful reader. You can find out more about the Japan-Italy connection in Amorous Woman, my tips for newcomers to erotica, my mission to elevate Japanese men to international sex symbols, my fantasy film adaptation of the novel and of course more secrets from my past....

Leave a comment, if you're inspired, word-weaver friends of mine.

And stay tuned, a certain fellow chef-writer and I are planning something very nice for later this month. I guarantee it will get your juices flowing.

Pudding and Pie

I know, you're tired of holiday feasting, but I hope you saved just a little bit of room for some "Pudding and Pie" over at Oysters and Chocolate today. This is my debut story at this wonderful site that has regularly published some of my favorite erotica writers like Heidi Champa, Jeremy Edwards and Emerald. O&C has a system where y0u can rate/vote on the stories, so if you have a mind to help my ratings, don't forget to click on those stars :-)!

I had to go in for jury duty today, which was EXHAUSTING, but I got kicked off by the defense. Not sure if it's because of the Ph.D. or the fact I was a plaintiff in a civil suit myself and I'm pretty liberal with the concept of preponderance of evidence, but instead of doing my civic duty, I'll be writing dirty stories instead this week. I wonder which one is of more service to humankind?

Happy 2009 to you all!

Happy Birthday to Moi

Actually, I'm jumping the gun because today is officially Donna's Birthday Eve rather than the day itself, but I like to warm up with the self-congratulations and arbitrary indulgent commands to everyone in shouting distance. Birthdays are big at our house. In fact, they start the day before and continue on through the weekend. Naturally most of the celebration involves meals and other sensual treats. Tonight we're having a homemade pizza bash with friends--dessert is my friend Jennifer's famous homemade cheesecake which is luscious and light and my vote for the Best in the World (although admittedly of limited production). Tomorrow begins with a Japanese breakfast at the Hotel Nikko in San Francisco. I'm not sure what other selfish whims will come to mind. There will be a nice wine in the evening and some costume drama chick-film I'll force on my men. We'll spend a quiet evening at home away from the drunk drivers, stay up until midnight, and stumble into bed.

What's it like to have a birthday on the last day of the year, you may ask? Even if you don't ask, I'm going to tell you. It's not the day I'd choose. I'd prefer another time of the year, one that isn't already saturated in specialness and self-indulgence. I mean, seriously, at this time of the year we're all sick of gifts and special foods. I'd rather have a birthday on October 9 or June 12 or some day that could be mine alone. Plus, I think I still haven't recovered from my birthday party in first grade, when I invited all the girls in my class. My friend Pam did that for her birthday in October and everyone came. But for my party, five out of twelve showed up because the rest of them were visiting grandma or otherwise engaged.

I was really bummed and I've been sort of spooked about throwing parties ever since.

Over the years, however, I've come to see some advantages to a December 31 fete. First of all, it's really easy to figure out my age at any given point of the year. Secondly, my dad was really happy about the tax deduction. And last but not least, the whole world is in a festive mood right along with me--and I can get great deals on champagne!

So, world, tomorrow night, raise a champagne flute to all you've learned in the old year, the new year of hope and fresh beginnings, and of course, yours truly who is one year older and a wee bit wiser (but still hasn't thrown a birthday party for herself except for one ersatz Kennywood Park party in May in fifth grade which was mildly dissatisfying because everyone gave me May birthstone jewelry....)

And yes, the photo is me--like my frilly dress?

Happy New Year to you all!

Luscious Doesn't Have to Be Hard!

Although of course, sometimes it is ;-).

I will admit I am hardcore about my holiday cookie baking. There really is something more than a tad nutty about my December passion--the more demanding and stern the cookie recipe, the more I worship it, paying homage with oven mitt and offset spatula in hand. But some of my holiday treats are not at domineering. Take the puffed eggnog pancake, for example. It's SO easy to mix up and yet it comes out of the oven souffled and gorgeous and fragrant with the winter holidays. We had this last Sunday, and I may just have to whip up another batch before the twelve days of Christmas are done.

Here's the recipe--for ambitious and laid-back cooks alike!

Puffed Eggnog Pancake

(serves 2-3; can be doubled and baked in a 13x9 inch pan)

3 eggs
2/3 cup eggnog
1/2 cup flour
1/4 t. nutmeg
2 T. butter (I've used just one and it worked fine)
1/4 cup sliced almonds
1 1/2 teaspoons sugar
Syrup for serving

Preheat oven to 425F. Mix the eggs in a large mixing bowl with an electric mixer until frothy. Add the flour, then the eggnog and nutmeg, beating until well blended. The batter will be slightly lumpy. Place the butter in a 8x8x2-inch glass baking dish and place it in the oven until the butter is melted and sizzling; do not let it brown. Remove pan from the oven and immediately pour the batter into the pan. Sprinkle the top with almonds and sugar. Return the pan to the oven and bake for 15 minutes or until puffed and brown. Serve immediately with syrup.

Breasts and Cookies--Yet Another Link!

Little did I know how potent my postings yesterday would be! In fact, my musing about cookies and breasts even worked their way into the night-time reverie of my own fantasy chef, Kirsten Monroe. Here's how she describes my unwitting invasion of her dreams:

"I was sitting on your kitchen island surrounded by cookie porn. OMG! You wanted to talk about boobs and I kept coming back to your slippery apricot filling and browned butter. I said something -- can't remember what -- and you began laughing hysterically. It was dreamy. Your kitchen was just like Martha Stewart's only less shiny and it smelled like all the sweetness in heaven and all the browned butter in hell."

A less shiny--or should we say "naughty"?--Martha Stewart... yes, that is what I aspire to after all. I never really thought about roaming the earth as the Ghost of Christmas Cookies in the Japanese fashion of the living spirit wandering abroad at night, but there may be a future in it!

Should I Get Breast Implants?

Most people say “you don’t look like what I expected of an erotica writer.” Those who don’t say it are probably thinking it! No one has yet had the courage to tell me how the real me has differed from expectations. I know the popular image of the erotica writer at her desk probably involves a floozy wearing a corset, garters and stockings, and a damp thong, but surely my new friends wouldn’t think I’d wear such things to a meeting in public? It finally occurred to me the other day what the real message is.

They imagined I’d have larger breasts.

Not that size itself is the most important thing. Quality trumps quantity in my book, and I personally am quite satisfied with my endowment. But maybe, to please my public, I should consider breast implants.

What do you think?

Or maybe I should just shove a few dozen Christmas cookies in my shirt?

Pictures from an Orgy--Butter Included!

Orgies—they’re definitely fun, but it’s also a challenge keeping track of the different pleasures and possibilities happening around you. All the more so when you’re the director of the orgy, as I was this past week. Yes, I invited ten different participants into my home for a wild and slippery time of it. Five pounds of butter saw action, plus lots of fruity sweet thangs. I took pictures, too, so those who couldn't join in the action could watch from afar!

Okay, my regular readers have already guessed I’m talking about food, specifically holiday cookies. I’ve been indulging in my cookie orgy for five Decembers now, and this was a particularly wild year for me. I gave out eighteen boxes to teachers, soccer coaches, my writing mentors and such. I wish I could have sent you a box, but these cookies don’t really travel well. Instead, I hope food porn (of the photographic sort) and food erotica (of the written kind) will provide enough of a taste to get your mouth watering.

I made my classic recipes this year and tried out a few new ones that worked out well enough to make a repeat appearance next year. Of course, my bout of cookie madness had its predictable crises. I overmixed the base for the Pecan Squares just a tad and the Venetians were slightly unstable due to the fact the apricot jam had less whole fruit than usual resulting in a slippery filling. On the other hand, the Spoon Cookies were more flavorful--a hard year of book promotion gave me the courage to let the butter brown just a bit more than usual. But I suspect my recipients don’t bring the same critical eye and palate to my cookies. They seem to enjoy them with a sincerity you don’t really find in responses to writing.

To be honest, I love the excitement and satisfaction my cookies seem to inspire. Some highlights of this year: “Oh, the cookies! This is one of the highlights of our holiday!” “I look forward to these every year.” “These are the best cookies ever.” “You could get rich selling these.” “If I were married to your wife, I’d weigh five hundred pounds.”

Well, that’s probably enough to give you a taste of the acclaim. Sometimes I wonder if I shouldn’t swap writing for baking?

I promised pictures and here they are.


Exhibit A shows the hidden bottom layer of the first round of cookie boxes. It includes:

Yin-Yang Cookies—vanilla cookie dough with chocolate chips marries chocolate cookie dough with white chocolate chips

Chewy Pecan Squares—pecan caramel filling on a shortbread crust

Ribbon Cookies—layers of cherry, pistachio and chocolate cookie dough


The top layer has the more delicate cookies, including:

Venetians—Italian flag-tinted almond cake layers with apricot jam and bittersweet chocolate

Gevulde Speculaas—Dutch spice cookies with marzipan filling

Finnish Spoon Cookies—browned butter dough shaped with a silver spoon (that my grandmother received as a wedding gift in 1919) and sandwiched with mixed fruit jam

And some of the later boxes held a selection of the following, which you see on the plate, moving counter-clockwise from the upper left:


Cranberry-White Chocolate Drops—a double-vanilla sugar cookie dough with New England’s best dried cranberries and white chocolate chips

Mexican Wedding Cookies—a classic recipe with pistachios and the afore-mentioned dried cranberries

Lebkuchen—a German-style gingerbread with candied orange peel, almonds and cardamom. This is a new recipe that definitely tasted better after a few days of aging.

Not pictured and yet to be eaten, as they require a week to reach maturity (that is, they are culinarily under eighteen) are:

Rum Balls—the classic no-cook bon-bon made with vanilla wafers, pecans, cocoa and a nice jigger of rum

After handing out all of the packages and accepting the mostly enthusiastic thanks, my family got to enjoy the leftovers during our annual cookie buffets, where I spread out the tins of all the different kinds on our dining room table and we get to choose a few (or more than a few) each night. Because of the higher volume of gifting and gratitude this year, the cookie buffet only ran for about four nights, but it’s definitely one of my favorite parts of the holiday. Cookie madness is over for the year and I can sit back and enjoy the sweet rewards.

I hope your winter solstice holidays are equally sweet!

Do You Like Your Lingerie with an Amorous Twist?

Hey, the holiday treats just keep coming! It's not just the cookies. I have the sweetest pleasure to be featured on an awesome web site I've been lurking about on for some time now, ever since Jeremy Edwards introduced me to the pleasures of apricot panties and antique kimono.... Anyway, Ms. Slip of Girl got a copy of my novel, Amorous Woman, from her girlfriend Gracie Passette (a girlfriend after my own heart) and she liked it, too, and posted a wonderful review on her site.

She's also running a contest until December 18 where you can win a copy of Amorous Woman for yourself or a friend by doing one simple thing:

"All you have to do is tell me the most embarrassing place you've been caught reading erotica -- or, if you've never been caught, you can tell us your favorite place to read erotica &/or what's your favorite piece of lingerie to wear when you want to enjoy yourself reading erotica -- we're easy like that *wink*"

Now that's pretty easy, and it's also fun, so get your satin-clad booty (or boxer-clad booty or G-string or briefs or tap pants or whatever you wear under there-booty) over to Slip of a Girl and enter to win. I don't mind sending extra copies to my friends. I'm sure you have a girlfriend who'd like a little trip to Japan this holiday season?

It Gets Even Hotter at Dr. Dick's!

Forget Christmas, this is really what I’ve been waiting for: Part 2 of Dr. Dick’s interview with me is now available for your listening pleasure, and I mean pleasure! Maybe it’s because it always takes me just a little time to warm up properly. Or maybe it’s the lovely Malbec the doctor kept pouring into my glass while I sank deeper into that comfy beanbag chair. But the second half is probably my most intimate interview ever. I get naughty, I get bitchy, I even change genders for a brief time--and hey, it’s really interesting to be on the other side of the sex war! So, if you want to hear the real Donna George Storey (and her dirty-minded male alter-ego) let it all hang out, pop on over to Dr. Dick's right now! I guarantee you'll be moved ;-).

My Naughty Secret Life

You may think I’m just an ordinary smut writer, but in fact I have a secret life…as...gasp!...a cookie-baking mom! This past Thursday I went public with my hidden vice by giving a presentation at my son’s school’s annual Festival of Lights.

Here was my blurb for the presentation:

“The Sweet Art of Cookie-Baking in Northern Europe

During the cold, dark Decembers of the northern hemisphere, kitchen artists in every house had to create their own light. What better way to brighten your life than delicious homemade cookies? Help stir up a batch of three-layered ribbon cookies, then sample the final sweet result, while we talk about traditions of baking and hospitality at year end in Europe and North America.”

In the photo above you see me prepared for the demonstration of assembling “Ribbon Cookies” (the kids helped add the flavoring to each of three portions of dough). Note that my gingerbread house is on display as well.

Now, I was fully prepared for a turn-out like most of my book readings, that is, a select, but intelligent and discerning group of people who appreciate life’s sensual pleasures. Lo and behold, the place was packed—by far a bigger crowd than all of my other book events put together (excepting In the Flesh LA and NYC which sort of don’t count). I think I may need to rethink my path to fame and fortune. Cookies definitely trump sex in terms of public interest, or so my research thus far has shown.



Before a standing room only crowd, I spoke about Christmas sweets customs in Europe and my childhood memories of my mother and her friends baking many kinds and serving them to guests. Polish poppyseed cookies, Swedish Nut Rolls, Russian Tea Cakes—it was like a mini trip to Europe for me! And so I continue the tradition today, when I’ll start the first batch of Christmas cookies 2008, Finnish spoon cookies, formed with a spoon my grandmother got for a wedding present in 1919.

But back to the event. After my brief lecture in which I confessed my cookie mania and made full use of my cookie map of Europe, I invited the kids to help with the final assembly of the cookies and about a dozen volunteered enthusiastically. I got several queries as to whether the gingerbread house could be consumed on the spot, but I held off the hungry hoards, determined to save that destructive pleasure for my own kids on Christmas Eve (they had to put up with the stress of the construction after all). Then parents and kids alike got to sample ribbon cookies and persimmon cookies I made from an old recipe of one of my son's classmates grandmothers. I got lots of compliments and requests for both recipes, which made me happy. I do like to make mouths water one way or another.

If you’d like to make your own Ribbon Cookies, here’s the recipe:

Ribbon Cookies
(from A Baker’s Field Guide to Christmas Cookies)

Yields 100 cookies

2 1/2 cups all purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 large egg
1/4 cup minced candied cherries or
candied orange peel
2 drops liquid red food coloring
1/4 cup finely chopped unsalted natural pistachios
2 drops liquid green food coloring
1/2 oz. unsweetened chocolate, melted
1/4 cup miniature chocolate chips

Line bottom and sides of a 4 x 8” straight-sided loaf pan with plastic wrap, using enough to overhang all sides.

Whisk flour, salt, and baking powder together in a small bowl.

In a large bowl with an electric mixer on medium speed, beat butter until creamy, about 2 minutes. Add sugar gradually, beating until light and fluffy, about 3 minutes. Beat in vanilla and egg.

Add about one-third of the flour mixture and mix on low speed. Gradually add remaining flour, mixing just until blended. Divide dough in three equal parts (use measuring cup to make sure they are even) and place in individual bowls. Add cherries or orange peel to one, stir until combined (I also added a few drops red food coloring), and pat in an even layer in loaf pan. I arrange about 8-10 flat measuring Tablespoons of dough into the pan and press it flat with an offset spatula, then smooth it to make an even layer.

Add pistachios to another, stir until combined and stir in food coloring. Pat into an even layer on top of cherry layer. Stir melted chocolate and chocolate morsels into the third until well blended, and pat in an even layer on top of pistachio layer. Fold plastic wrap over dough to cover completely and refrigerate until firm enough to slice, at least 4 hours or overnight.

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Line two cookie sheets with parchment paper.

Unwrap loaf pan and unmold cookie dough by pulling up on plastic wrap to aid the process. Peel plastic completely away. Cut 1/3-inch slices crosswise off end of loaf. Lay slices flat on work surface so that the various layers of cookie are horizontal in front of you. Cut each cookie into four pieces, top to bottom, so that each slice has all three flavors. Place two inches apart on cookie sheets. Bake just until light golden brown, about 8-10 minutes. Slide parchment onto racks to cool cookies completely.

Amorous Woman Makes Violet Blue's Top 10!

Woo hoo! Pop open the champagne, not that we ever need an excuse, but I do have most excellent news: Amorous Woman made Violet Blue’s top ten sexy book list for this Christmas! The list is in no particular order, but I did come first, which I usually do, but I’m getting off topic here. The holidays have a way of putting me in the mood!

Anyway, Violet knows a good dirty story when she sees one, as is clearly evident in this year’s hotter-than-ever Best Women’s Erotica 2009. I’ll be talking more about this soon, but it always is a special December treat, and definitely a good way to cap off my writing year.

Alison Tyler's inspiring Never Have the Same Sex Twice and Rachel Kramer Bussel's delectable Tasting Him and Tasting Her are also on the list. As I said, Violet has the very best "taste" when it comes to these matters! And that makes for an offering that is sure to please for almost everyone on your winter solstice gift list....

Am I Hardcore?

That’s what erotica writer Jane Black (check out her bittersweet and very hot story of sexual awakening on Clean Sheets this week--it's a good one!) told me when I described this year’s gingerbread house project. What makes this year’s special is a little experiment of mine, inspired by a recipe for stained glass cookies. I decided to melt some butterscotch disks and see if they might make nice windows for a gingerbread abode. And in fact, this leap of creativity paid off nicely. Note the golden glow emanating from the edible edifice—the perfect touch of tingly warmth for the long December nights.

Again I’m reminded of the refreshingly uncomplicated response this kind of creativity inspires. The compliments abound and they seem totally sincere. Maybe that’s because no one else is crazy enough to spend so much time on gingerbread houses? I mean, there are professional pastry chefs who do it for display in hotels or other public places. They’re definitely hardcore, but it’s their full time job and they get paid for it, the dominatrices of the genre. And then there are those kits of pre-baked pieces you glue together with icing and let the kids decorate. It’s a great idea, but, well, a little too soft and wimpy to turn me on.



I won’t lie to you. This little cottage looks simple and charming enough, but it took me hours to draw the pattern, bake the pieces, assemble and decorate. An absurd amount of time, really. There’s no doubt it’s like a short story. You want it to look seamless and self-contained. No sweat, doubts or swear words ever disgraced its conception. But they lurk just the same in the secret history of the smooth, finished piece. If those gingerbread walls could talk!




Anyway, I think Jane has a point, but I certainly wasn’t as hardcore this year as when I spent weeks on “Holiday Inn,” pictured above. That was definitely hardcore. But maybe this year it would be better to call me “mediumcore.” You know, vanilla, but made with fresh vanilla beans and organic cream, topped with homemade hot fudge and fresh, toasted pecans with a glace cherry on top?

What do you think? (Slack-jawed admiration of the magical wonder of my gingerbread house is shamelessly accepted).

A Note for Insane Gingerbread Architects: The windows are an easy trick to tuck in your bag. Just place two butterscotch candies together on a parchment-lined cookie sheet, bake at 350 degrees for 8-10 minutes or until melted and spreading, then smooth with a spoon, if necessary (it may not be). Lift them from the paper after about a minute with a spatula and cool on a rack. Glue them to the inside of the windows with royal icing and voila!

My HOTTEST Interview Ever!

My favorite part of book promotion has definitely been the interviews. Each host who’s been kind enough to me into their airy salon has asked thought-provoking, intelligent questions and helped me see my work in a new way. I’ve felt true support and interest and each time my life feels a bit richer for the experience. Of course, radio has its restrictions and the George Carlin rules shaped our discussions, but rather like a good bondage session, sometimes restrictions can increase the pleasure.

Then again, sometimes it’s fun just to say, forget rules and let it all hang out! That’s what I’ve done on my interview with the charming and provocative Dr. Dick. Thanks to an introduction by the awesome Jeremy Edwards, Dr. Dick invited me to be part of his series of interviews with artists who explore the erotic in their work, called The Erotic Mind.

The first part of my interview on Dr. Dick’s Sex Advice: Sex Advice With An Edge is available for your listening pleasure right here. I read from a shamelessly juicy part of Amorous Woman and tell all about how I started writing, why I write under my own name, the allure of multi-cultural erotica and much more. And if you like part one, you are really going to enjoy part two. That’s when things get really steamy!

An Armchair Trip to Japan's "Floating World"

My promotional activities for Amorous Woman have led me to some very entertaining and educational locales in cyberspace. Today I make a stop at Readerville.com's "Odd Shelf" feature with my list of favorite books on Japan's after-dark entertainment districts. Geisha, love hotels, spring prints, bar hostesses, pink salons and soaplands, the notorious Abe Sada, exquisite kaiseki dinners. If you have a vivid imagination--and I know the readers of my blog most definitely do--you can experience them all with my selection of elegantly written and beautifully illustrated books. Check out some of the other lists, too--and leave a comment if you're so inspired!

I'm on Cult of Gracie Tonight!

I'm getting all fluttery just thinking about it. If you have a few minutes tonight at 7 pm PST, stop by to listen, ask a question and hopefully feel some fluttery excitement right along with me! I'll give the tell-all report tomorrow....

Christmas Cookies are like Sex?

The December edition of “Cooking up a Storey” is up at ERWA this week. Can you believe I’ve been at it for one full year of erotic musings with recipe? This month’s topic is A Year of Living Shamelessly: Hustlers, Exhibitionists and the Libidinous Magic of the Ordinary. I talk about orgies, food porn and Christmas cookie sex. There’s a juicy excerpt from my story, “Six Layers of Sweetness” (or is that “Sex Layers of Sweetness”?) and a recipe for a cookie for shameless show-offs. Might that be you? Read it and find out for yourself!

By the way, the photo is an example of one of my annual Christmas cookie boxes. Sex layers of sweetness indeed....