All right, I think I am getting comfortable with blogging, because I'm not going to muse thoughtfully about some deep subject this time, I'm just going to post some jokes that come from the internet via the Clean Sheets weekly newsletter. I get the CS newsletter because it's my favorite erotica webzine and they've been good to me there. And under the guidance of editor-in-chief Susannah Indigo, the sex is always sprinkled with a sense of humor. These definitely made me giggle:
A man bumps into a woman in a hotel lobby and as he does,
his elbow goes into her breast. They are both quite
startled. The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your
heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me."
She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in
One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts
rubbing his wife's arm. The wife turns over and says "I'm
sorry honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow
and I want to stay fresh." The husband, rejected, turns
over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his
wife again. "So when is your next dentist appointment?"
Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed
there for a number of years when he came home one day to
confess to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion:
He had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle
slicer. His wife suggested that he should see a sex
therapist to talk about it, but Bill said he would be
too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the compulsion on
One day a few weeks later, Bill came home and his wife
could see at once that something was seriously wrong.
"What's wrong, Bill?" she asked. "Do you remember that
I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my
penis into the pickle slicer?"
"Oh, Bill, you didn't!" she exclaimed. "Yes, I did," he
replied. "My God, Bill, what happened?" "I got fired."
"No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle
slicer?" "Oh...she got fired too."